I took a sip of mom’s tea or having snacks while my eyes set straightly to a drama series (Turkey, recently) or taking a good snap for my instagram; everytime I feel like ‘huh?’ over my life. Either because I’m to perplexed to think of solution to my problem, or I just can’t state what exactly my problem is. I feel like ‘huh?’ and those above are kind of my medication.

There was a moment when I have to deal with a problem, a lot of thoughts alternately came through my mind. Mostly begins with a question in my head, then come alternatives A, B, C along with each option’s plus minus. It’s like you were listening to a scenario, but this, happen inside your head. Chill, if you think you can’t imagine, because neither can I.

Then what?
I will keep on thinking about it and only thinking and doing literally nothing, as if I was dealing with it by oneself. I forgot one thing. I have Allah.
A conversation between a Mom and her Daughter consciously cause me to realise it.
Mom asked Daughter for praying before sleep and don’t be afraid when you sleep in dark as the lamp is off and Daughter agreeably said so, while affirming that afraid is irrelevant after you pray, because Allah’s with you. It is okay if we can’t see Allah, for Allah can always sees you.

It brought my tears blurred my sight, literally and metaphorically, as what Daughter said is true. Also the fact it is coming from a four-going-to-five-years-old girl.

God, I have a big problem. Hey problem, I have a BIG GOD!


I came to my friends’ college graduation ceremony some time ago. Graduation. I don’t know if I like this thing or not, I mean, it’s actually only like one-day-happiness. Though I really enjoyed organizing all of the graduation needs, like, wondering the wardrobes, gift preparation, and all. I really enjoyed it like I don’t want it reminds me about the day after it. I don’t want it’ll be both the end of school and our friendship. It was one of days in our life where we’d busy spending our phone’s battery for taking photos and never feel enough because we know, we were in the doorstep of separation. I know separation is a must, and for whatever reason it been made, I choose to believe that it is for the good. One that I know, we’ll never be the same all over again. Our relationship either will gets tighter than ever or getting loose and looser. And I hate the second option.

You walked across that graduation stage and hugged your best friends, promising to stay in touch and vowing to be friends forever. Four years have passed and facetime calls have become casual text messages that have become once a month check in’s that have now become awkward run in’s at coffee shop because no one can pinpoint where the friendship ended but it has.
(Chelsea Camerlin)

Maybe some of us experienced it. As the time goes by, the friendship fades and says goodbye. So let’s just no promises, no vows. Let’s live based on how we used to. The difference’s just, we won’t sit together and talk as often as usual. But please keep the conversation going. Even if it’s just a short hi.

Or perhaps we can try to keep the conversation away for a while, just to increase our longing to meet in person. If it works, when we meet just in time, I hope we will engage in an endless conversation with no shortage of chatter like never before.

 Dear whoever who's just graduate, Congratulations! Graduation is both an end and a beginning. End of college life, beginning of real life.

x, Virga Maleva